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Love Island host Maya Jama and rapper Stormzy have been photographed holding hands together on holiday in Greece – four years after their break up. Jama, 29, and Stormzy – real name Michael Omari Owuo Jr – 30, first met in October 2014, before either of their careers had taken off and started dating in January the following year. In 2018, the Vossi Bop rapper marked their anniversary on Instagram by posting: “Three years with the love of my life”. But by 2019, they had parted ways. Jama told ES Magazine at the time of the split that “everybody just sees it as entertainment”. Meanwhile Stormzy sang on his track Lessons: “You gave me the world and then I gave you disrespect. Hand on my heart, this is my biggest of regrets.” So, years on, what would a relationship expert say about getting back together if you’re in a similar situation? “Getting back with your ex shouldn’t be a decision that you make lightly,” says Gillian Myhill, dating expert and co-founder of dating app Sizzl. “If you’re looking to make it work, there are several factors that you need to consider.” Examine what wasn’t working previouslyYou broke up for a reason so it’s important to assess the relationship, what was and wasn’t working, and why you broke up in the first place, she says. “Consider how much time has passed since you decided to end the relationship. You both may have changed as people, and grown and learned some life lessons.”Take responsibility for wrongdoing We’ve all probably done or said things we regret, so own it. “It’s also important to look at your role in the relationship and take responsibility for any wrongdoing or neglect and ask yourself honest questions about whether you can approach the relationship and your ex differently,” Myhill says. Take your time It might be wise not to rush.“If you’re considering getting back with your ex, I’d recommend taking things slowly and cautiously, giving yourselves space both individually and as a couple to figure things out.” She advises setting boundaries and expectations of what you need and make it clear what you want from the relationship, while respecting your partner’s boundaries too – and even considering couple’s therapy. “You need to be able to trust your ex, and yourself, and you may need to have difficult conversations that involve confronting the past,” she says, “and you’ll need to make sure you’re ready for that. “But it’s also important that you make a very conscious decision to move on, start afresh and be ready to forgive.”Think about the people around youNot everyone may be on board, Myhill points out. “You may need to prove yourself or your partner may need to prove themselves. Discuss with your family and friends and ask for time, support and patience in helping you figure this out.” Get away Much like Jama and Stormzy, a holiday might be what you need. “I recommend taking a break as a couple, going away for the weekend to remove yourself from judgement and other people’s opinions so you can work things out together and impartially,” says Myhill.Ask the difficult questions“It’s really important that you follow your intuition and ask yourself the hard questions. Is this right for you? Will you be happier in the relationship than out of it? Are you prepared to forgive and move on? Have they changed? Are you doing it for the right reasons?” If you can’t answer these questions “fully, honestly and positively” Myhill says it might be time to close that chapter and move on.

A woman has been condemned as a terrible daughter after chosing to miss her own mother’s wedding to attend a concert. To be fair, this isn’t just any concert, but a Taylor Swift ‘Eras’ show which, the disgraced daughter insisted, is a “once-in-a-lifetime experience”. However, inevitably, the move didn’t go down well with her mum, nor with thousands of social media users, after she attempted to defend her decision on Reddit. Explaining how the predicament came about, she wrote: “My mom is getting remarried (my birth father passed away a while ago). A few weeks ago I won Taylor Swift tickets on the radio for the same day as her wedding. “I made the decision to go to the concert over the wedding, and I told her this, and she is very upset- she has not spoken to me since.” Sign up for our free Indy100 weekly newsletter The Redditor continued: “I love my mother and feel bad missing her wedding, but I thought she would understand due to the circumstances. I do not like my soon-to-be stepfather, and I feel like seeing Taylor Swift is a once-in-a-lifetime experience that I do not want to miss.” Wrapping up her monologue, she stressed: “I have made it very clear to my mom over the past few months that I am not okay with the marriage, but still plan[ned] to be at the wedding. “But then I won the tickets, and things changed.” The post racked up more than 2,500 comments within a day as users of the AITA forum voiced their fury at her selfishness. “Unless you hate your mother [...] this is SUCH a s***ty thing to do,” one wrote. “Don't expect her at any of your own major life milestones!” “[Taylor Swift] is not once in a lifetime. But your mother finding happiness again (regardless of your like for the groom) is very rare,” pointed out another. “This is why people hate crazy fans. How tf could anyone with their right mind choose a concert over their loved ones??” said a third. Meanwhile, a fourth noted: “Even Taylor Swift wouldn't want you to miss your mother's wedding to go to her concert.” Still, others were more forgiving of the original poster (OP). One asked: “Is there no way to do both? Can you do the ceremony then skip the reception and head to the concert?” They then added: “Also for what it's worth I would probably skip my own wedding for eras tickets.” Another then replied with a lengthy, personal take on the whole affair writing: “The concert isn't the issue - from my perspective, it's more of an excuse not to go to the wedding (and do something else that occupies your mind and feels personally purposeful). “I've lived through my mother getting married to a man I intensely disliked (it was mutual). Luckily (?) I wasn't even invited, even though I had still been living with her at the time, and she even tried to avoid telling me about the wedding at all, "so I wouldn't get upset". “This whole period of my life is obviously one of the reasons I regularly attend therapy.” “I hope you will, at least one day, have a sincere conversation with your mother about all this. And perhaps, that she will realize, in time, that a husband your children have a big issue with usually isn't the right choice.” They continued: “I know yours is a very complicated issue, but I think that not all people on Reddit know the pain this kind of relationship can inflict on you. “I'm still traumatized by having to play along even when I really wanted to do the opposite, just because I had no choice at the time. Do what's best for your mental health. We do not need to always accommodate everyone around us, especially if it isn't a mutual thing.” Have your say in our news democracy. Click the upvote icon at the top of the page to help raise this article through the indy100 rankings.

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