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Kate Silverton on swapping her BBC news career to work as a child therapist
Kate Silverton on swapping her BBC news career to work as a child therapist
Most people know Kate Silverton from her time as a BBC newsreader, or possibly from when she took part in Strictly Come Dancing. But that’s the old Kate Silverton. The new Kate Silverton is a qualified child therapist – so what made the mum-of-two swap such a successful media career to help children instead? “The love of it! My academic background is in child psychology, and becoming a mum really inspired me too,” she says. She’s worked with a number of children’s mental health charities over the years, and explains: “My journey has really been decades long, both in understanding more about children’s mental health, and as a parent really benefiting from all the interviews and access to advice that I was given by incredible people.” Currently working in a primary school supporting young children with complex needs, Silverton, 52, admits that when she competed on Strictly in 2018 (she was paired with professional dancer Aljaž Škorjanec and finished eighth), it was with a view of leaving journalism to train as a child therapist. “And that’s what I did,” she declares proudly. “My interest has been long-held, and I’ve now qualified, and it’s absolutely my life’s passion. So I’ll be using journalism and all my presenting experience to raise awareness around children’s mental health and really to support parents. “I’ve had an incredible life in journalism [presenting BBC News at One and BBC Breakfast, among other high-profile TV and radio roles], and many, many years that have been really fulfilling. I think you’re always drawing upon the experiences you’ve picked up before, but as a mum especially, for me, this is now where home is, and will become my life’s work.” Silverton’s two children, Clemency and Wilbur, are now aged 11 and eight, and were conceived naturally after Silverton and her husband, Mike Heron, tried IVF but it wasn’t successful. She continued to work as a journalist after Clemency was born, but took two years off when she had Wilbur in 2014. “I was freelance, but it got to the point where I thought I can’t physically do this – you know, I’m an older parent as well. “I had to make a judgement call – and I can only ever speak for myself, there’s no judgement for others. But I took two years out because I just couldn’t see any other way of doing everything, and doing it the way I hoped to. “It’s really, really hard for parents now, and I say to a lot of the parents I speak to in my clinical work, ‘Please, please, please do not berate yourself, we are living in a very challenging time’. We’re pulled in so many ways, we’re still doing a lot of work at home, and we’re expected to be present either at work, and/or at home. “So there’s no easy answer. But I think we owe it to our children to start asking, is this really working for us as parents? And is it working for our children?” Was she worried that taking two years out might affect her career? “I was the main breadwinner,” she says, “And my husband and I made a decision between us that things would change. And I think a lot of families do that – they have to find themselves having really difficult conversations. And certainly, there are no easy answers. “But what I found is I’ve changed my career, and I see it as a second act, if you like, and maybe that’s thanks to having children. So sometimes, what can seem a really difficult decision and one that we might worry about, you kind of think, actually, maybe it wasn’t the right place for me, after all.” She returned to journalism after her two years out, but was working at weekends doing the Saturday night news while her husband looked after the kids. “Ultimately, I thought I don’t want to be doing this, I don’t want to be in the newsroom on a Saturday night when my children are at home with my husband,” she says. “We all make these decisions based on our own personal circumstances, and for me at the time, I was ready to follow my heart and retrain, as that had been in my mind for a very long time. So I guess the decision made itself, really.” Silverton is now determined to help make family life work not only for herself, but for other parents, and as well as her work in a primary school and writing the book There’s No Such Thing As ‘Naughty’ (Piatkus, 2021) – a parenting guide which explores how children’s brains develop and how it influences their behaviour – she’s teamed up with the children’s furniture brand Stokke to explore parents’ worries about child development in the under-fives. New Stokke research has found 29% of parents of children aged zero to five years are concerned about their child growing up shy, and nearly a third (31%) of parents identify confidence as the most important characteristic for their child to gain during their early years. “First and foremost for children, especially under five, we want to ensure the foundations being built in their brain are strong,” explains Silverton. “And parents are the best people to build those foundations for future mental health.” In practical terms, what do parents need to do to help their children learn to be confident and mentally strong? “Be with them,” advises Silverton. “Our presence is really crucial, because when our children inevitably navigate more challenging experiences, having us nearby to model the behaviour that’s appropriate can give them the confidence to know they can eventually go off alone. “I’d love parents to feel more confident to follow their instincts when it comes to being with their children. Our children don’t necessarily need to be doing in these early years, they simply need to be. And by that I mean being with and alongside us as their guide. Because parents really are more powerful than they know.” She stresses it isn’t about buying young children expensive educational toys or doing anything complicated. “It’s the little things that mean so much – putting the phone down and actually engaging with our children face-to-face, getting down on the floor and playing with them, spending time with them, letting them know we value them and we want to spend time with them, we love and we delight in their presence. These are the things that build confidence, because they’re building a sense of self-worth.” Although she’s stepped back from her high-profile broadcasting career, Silverton’s still very busy with child therapy and writing her second book, which she hopes will be published in the autumn. But, as she says herself, “We’re told we can have it all – well, actually, you can have it all, but not at the same time.” “Being a busy parent who’s also trying to work, I suppose the victim is my own wellbeing,” she reflects. “It’s not like I’m terrible, but it does get squeezed more than I’d like.” However, she does find some time to look after herself. “Whether it’s bouncing on a little trampoline, or going to walk your dog or doing yoga, anything that’s patterned, repetitive, rhythmic, is actually very soothing for our brain stem, and absolutely vital for our health,” she explains. “I am really mindful of my health, and I’d love to carve out more time, and certainly when I’ve got book two finished, I will be doing a lot more of it. But I pretty much keep in balance, and I’m fairly good at recognising when my body’s out of kilter and then doing something about it. So I haven’t learned this much without applying a few good principles myself!” Kate Silverton is supporting Stokke to explore parents’ worries about child development and the early years. Read More Charity boss speaks out over ‘traumatic’ encounter with royal aide Ukraine war’s heaviest fight rages in east - follow live Watching Love Island this year? How to avoid comparing your body to what’s on screen Dating ‘green flags’ to look out for on Love Island – and in your own life Crackdown on vape adverts targeting kids – what parents can do
2023-05-31 14:55
Navigating the two sides of Somalia's capital Mogadishu
Navigating the two sides of Somalia's capital Mogadishu
Journalist Soraya Ali travels to Somalia to see if it really is how her mother remembers it.
2023-05-31 08:47
First Peek: Asus Demos a TUF Gaming Concept PC That Hides All the Cables
First Peek: Asus Demos a TUF Gaming Concept PC That Hides All the Cables
PCs are ever evolving, but when it comes to building one, some bits haven't changed
2023-05-31 08:15
Asus ExpertWiFi Routers Offer Small Businesses Easy Setup, Smart Profiles
Asus ExpertWiFi Routers Offer Small Businesses Easy Setup, Smart Profiles
TAIPEI—Woeful Wi-Fi speeds in coffee shops, gyms, and home offices could finally be a problem
2023-05-31 06:58
It’s Grilling Season, Which Means It’s Also Clean-Your-Grill Season—Here Are the Best Ways To Do It
It’s Grilling Season, Which Means It’s Also Clean-Your-Grill Season—Here Are the Best Ways To Do It
Charred gunk on your grill can inhibit performance and lead to a bummer of a burger. Here’s how to fix it.
2023-05-31 06:25
Interest-Rate Path in Focus as Bank of Thailand Heads for Quarter-Point Hike
Interest-Rate Path in Focus as Bank of Thailand Heads for Quarter-Point Hike
Thailand’s central bank will probably raise borrowing costs by another quarter-point on Wednesday, with the decision itself likely
2023-05-31 05:27
Plant-Based Meat Predicted to Rebound as It Gets Cheaper and Tastier
Plant-Based Meat Predicted to Rebound as It Gets Cheaper and Tastier
A maker of veggie burgers and plant-based meat products backed by a multinational joint venture expects demand for
2023-05-31 02:54
Adidas Can’t Freeze Ye’s $75 Million Yeezy Marketing Payment
Adidas Can’t Freeze Ye’s $75 Million Yeezy Marketing Payment
Adidas AG lost a court bid to freeze $75 million it paid to Ye, the rapper and designer
2023-05-31 02:50
What's new in robots? An AI-powered humanoid machine that writes poems
What's new in robots? An AI-powered humanoid machine that writes poems
Robots are on display at the International Conference on Robotics and Automation in London, where visitors can get a glimpse of the future
2023-05-31 01:45
Why Do Dogs Eat Grass?
Why Do Dogs Eat Grass?
A dog that eats grass frantically may be trying to vomit—but the behavior doesn't automatically warrant a trip to the vet.
2023-05-30 23:51
Watching Love Island this year? How to avoid comparing your body to what’s on screen
Watching Love Island this year? How to avoid comparing your body to what’s on screen
ITV2 has and revealed the first 10 contestants who will be heading to Majorca to take part in the summer season of Love Island. Commercial estate agent Catherine Agbaje, semi-professional footballer Tyrique Hyde and model Ella Thomas are among the islanders who will enter the Spanish villa when the new series starts on Monday, June 5. We’re set for another summer of romantic recouplings, dramatic dumpings and bombshell arrivals, but it’s important to remember that this brand of ‘reality’ TV doesn’t always reflect the real world. Especially when it comes to body diversity. Love Island contestants lounge around in swimwear all day, meaning there’s more of a focus on their physiques than on other shows. While for some viewers, the clothing (or lack thereof) doesn’t make a difference, it’s understandable if you do find that you compare yourself unfavourably to the scantily-clad islanders. “It depends really on the way that we do that comparison, whether it’s positive or negative,” says Lowri Dowthwaite, lecturer in psychological interventions at the University of Central Lancashire. “We do know that there’s a big link between that kind of negative comparison and people feeling bad about themselves or feeling that they’re not good enough.” There may also be a gender divide when it comes to comparison and body image. Dowthwaite says: “Women have a tendency to be to compare themselves a lot more. Rumination around that as well tends to be higher in women… and that can be quite damaging.” Indeed, a 2019 YouGov survey found that 75% of Love Island viewers agreed with the statement ‘it is important for me to look physically attractive’, the majority of which (43%) were aged 18 to 29. “When people are younger, I think naturally we are much more self-conscious and much more preoccupied with the way that we look,” says Dowthwaite. “As people get older, past 30 or 40, the preoccupation gets a bit less. I definitely think it is a bit of a thing that affects the younger people.” In turn, this ‘compare and dispair’ mindset can affect our behaviour or self-esteem. “People get drawn into that negative self-evaluation, where they maybe focus in on one particular part of their body that they’re not happy with. In extreme cases, it might have an impact on dieting,” Dowthwaite continues. Although she points out: “We can’t definitely say that the media and what we see causes eating disorders, because it’s too complex to say that. I think it’s about how we consume [TV] helpfully.” So how can viewers enjoy Love Island in a balanced, body positive way? Remember it’s not always realistic First of all, remind yourself of all the technical trickery that goes into making glossy TV shows. “It’s filmed in a way with lighting whereby it’s going to accentuate people’s features, there’s a lot of editing that goes into it as well,” says Dowthwaite. Same goes for the glamorous promo materials: “It’s photographed in such a way that, you know, it’s not real life – real people have flaws, we all have flaws.” Plus, these contestants have had weeks or months or get ready for their ‘big TV reveal’. “They might have gone through rigorous regimes to get themselves looking as good as they can possibly look,” she says. It’s not healthy to try to have the same figure as someone who is, for example, naturally very thin: “If you’re not genetically meant to be that slim, then you’re not going to be.” Monitor what you’re consuming With reality shows that are designed to keep you hooked, it’s easy to forget how they might be affecting your mood. “You need to become conscious of it,” says Dowthwaite, who recommends keeping a diary of what you’re viewing in terms of TV or social media and monitoring how it makes you feel. “If you find that you’ve consumed lots of things like Love Island and things that are appearance-based and you’re feeling quite low and moody… there’s probably a correlation between that.” Seek out body positivity To counteract the effects of unattainable reality TV ideals, it can help to follow body positive Instagram or TikTok accounts. “We need to see more of that, I think, in the media, to help people to not be so self-critical,” says Dowthwaite. “And to kind of appreciate that we’re all different shapes and sizes – and that’s good.” Focus on other activities Ultimately, it’s not healthy to derive your self-esteem from your looks, which is why you need to remind yourself that there’s more to life than having a Love Island-level body. “What are you good at? What talents do you have? What interests do you have? What are your strengths? Those kinds of things are a lot more important,” says Dowthwaite. If you’re feeling down about yourself, switch off the telly and take part in some mood-boosting activities. “Exercising and using your body to do things that you enjoy, like going for walks in nature, or doing yoga or horseback riding or whatever it is you’d like to do, that’s a way to have a healthier relationship with your body,” Dowthwaite recommends. “Moving your body in the great outdoors is just an excellent way to kind of feel that all that stuff doesn’t really matter that much.” Love Island returns to ITV2 and ITVX on Monday June 5. Voting for the first coupling up opens at 8am on Thursday on the Love Island app. Read More Charity boss speaks out over ‘traumatic’ encounter with royal aide Ukraine war’s heaviest fight rages in east - follow live Dating ‘green flags’ to look out for on Love Island – and in your own life Crackdown on vape adverts targeting kids – what parents can do How to make a small garden feel bigger
2023-05-30 21:55
What’s Trending Today: Musk in China, Air New Zealand Passenger Weigh-In, Holmes Heads to Jail
What’s Trending Today: Musk in China, Air New Zealand Passenger Weigh-In, Holmes Heads to Jail
Welcome to Social Buzz, a daily column looking at what’s trending on social media platforms. I’m Caitlin Fichtel,
2023-05-30 20:26
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